One of my fellow PTA cohorts sent this to me – thought it was too good to pass up and needed to be shared with the world. (Or at least my little Internet corner of it anyway).
Here is something we’ve long theorized, but now has been mathematically proven:
What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?
Here’s a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions…
If the alphabet is represented as:
A = 1, B = 2, C = 3, and so on, until Z = 26
8+1+18+4+ 23+15+18+11 = 98%
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%
AND, look how far butt kissing will take you.
2+21+20+20+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 140%
So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while Hard Work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it’s the Bullshit and Butt kissing that will put you over the top.
I recently saw a re-run of a television show on the Discovery Channel which reminded me of the original idea to use this domain name for a blog. About a year ago, my husband Dougal and I saw an ad for a tv show that looked pretty interesting – Dive to Bermuda Triangle – a show discussing scientific phenomena which would explain the odd occurrences in the Bermuda Triangle.
We tuned in, interested to hear some scientific theories, as opposed to the usual mystical explanations regarding the Bermuda Triangle. The show began well – discussing a prominent theory that large gas bubbles released from submerged rock formations could be responsible for sinking ships as well as interfering with aircraft controls. They even showed several experiments in which the release of these large gas bubbles did indeed cause ships to sway violently, and eventually ended up causing them to capsize.
Up to this point, the show seemed to maintain it’s scientific integrity; however, did I fail to mention that these large gas bubbles were methane gas? The fact that these “killer” (yes, “killer”) gas bubbles were methane was already causing a minor amounty of hilarity, but then, about half-way through the discussion of this gas-bubble theory, a new “scientific expert” was introduced to the program. A geologist? An oceanographer? No indeedy – a “Self-Proclaimed Bubbleologist”! Dougal and I looked at each other, as if to silently say, “Did he really say he was a Bubbleologist?”
After a great deal of snorking and several “Don Ho” jokes later, I informed my husband that *I* am a Self-Proclaimed Webologist! Then, going back to the gas bubble theory, I asked him something like, “So, if a bunch of submariners all farted at once, could they sink an enemy ship?” His immediate reply was, “You need a blog.” Hence the emergence of one Self-Proclaimed Webologist and digitaldivas.net.
Why yes, it is! So why, may you ask, did I make this site so very pink? I could quote my children, and just simply say, “Because I do!”. And while that would indeed be accurate, the underlying reason is that over a series of time, I have created many other web sites that were either burgundy-and-black themed (worked at two different colleges – both of which had burgundy-and-black colors – go figure), or other earth and/or muted tones. Decided I wanted a change, so here’s my new blog that looks like it was hosed down with Pepto Bismol!
And what do I intend to post on this pink blog? Most likely, the rambling thoughts of a techno-geek Southern woman (yes, that would be me), and posts on my own topics of interest, that hopefully others will find interesting too.
So thanks for reading my first post, and please feel free to share your thoughts on any posts!